Mixed emotions :/

ZaoShangHao (Good morning) Bloggers! It's Monday morning and I'm writing to update you about last week's adventures... Though they were not adventures in the traditional sense, i.e. exploration of new places, they were adventures of new challenges and tasks. After the National Holiday (GuoQingJie) we returned to a short week.  Along with this new week we discovered that there were some changes happening to our schedules (yes, our schedules are STILL being shifted and changed in the middle of October). I originally had 10 classes that I taught throughout the week.  On Wednesday I was informed that some of the teachers had a meeting, which I was not informed of and therefore not included in the decision making process.  Needless to say, I was PISSED OFF. Those are my classes too. Why wouldn't I be a part of that meeting?! But I got over it... at least until I was notified that I lost 3 of my class (my favorite classes no less). I was upset, hurt, and quite frankly confused. Once I got my questions answered, I moved forward in life for about 36 hours when a whole new set of confusions came hurdling toward me. 

There was massive tension during the weekly grade 12 staff meeting. I sensed it and, being the person/counselor/mediator that I am, I stated the obvious. "I'm sensing a lot of tension in this room, and I'm not sure what is going on but we will not be successful as a team unless this gets sorted out." The Chinese teachers started pouring out their confusion about why the schedule was changed and why they weren't notified until the change was made.  They were also confused about the foreign teachers' clubs and tutoring sessions, i.e. what are clubs and why do you offer tutoring sessions? Does communication not exist in this school?! In the foreign teachers' contracts we are required to advise a club of our choice (naturally mine is dance) and on the same day our club activities are held, we are also required to offer tutoring for students who need a little extra help in our classes.  The Chinese teachers were not notified that we were offering these services, let alone that we are required to do it.  So when the students went to them with questions, the teachers did not have answers.  Everyone started talking over each other to try to explain what it was but no one was answering the Chinese teachers' questions. So I mediated (and by that I mean told the foreign teachers to shut up so I could talk) and went point by point in the simplest English I knew to answer each and every question.  My administrator's (from Oregon) comment/question was a hand to forehead moment: "Oh that's what you wanted to know? You just didn't have any knowledge of this at all." THAT'S WHAT THEY SAID YOU ID-ten-T. So once that was all cleared up we moved on to the next item on the agenda. We wrapped up the intense meeting and went on with our day.

About an hour later I told Giles, "OK spill. I can see your anger radiating from you and it's all directed at one person in particular.  You CANNOT let that affect your work here so let it all out now." He explained to me that within the last 4 days he's had 4 heated arguments with our administrator because our administrator isn't doing his job very well (which admittedly I agree with). So I am now acting as middle person for communication between them because I still have a good relationship with both of them. I'm not sure how long I can keep doing that though :/ What ever keeps the peace for a successful team. 

On a happier note (keep in mind I titled this MIXED emotions) I had my first dance club meeting! It was so much fun and the students loved it. It started off rocky since I had no room to dance in thanks to a miscommunication (of course). But once we found a room and started dancing, it was AH-MAZING! After I released the group I saw some girls in their classroom teaching and practicing the combination I taught them to other students :D I also had 4 more girls come to me and say, "We want to join your club!" I was so happy.

Then Friday came and I was hit with yet more confusion and maybe even a little defiance :/ A Chinese teacher came to me and asked if I could correct some essays from his class. I said yes (I really have nothing else to do with my time) and he said xiexie (thanks). Then he said, "On Monday, you can give these back to the students and give them feedback."  Hold up, wait a minute... This is the class that I got taken away from me. When on Monday am I supposed to give them feedback??? My response out loud was more like, "Oh I thought I didn't have this class anymore.  When would you like me to give them feedback?" His EXACT words, "We are not going to do that schedule change. You will see them on Monday." I wasn't comfortable with that so I went to Joanna (my roommate and the teacher my class was given to).  I explained the situation and asked what I should do.  We both went to our administrator and explained it to him and he said he would take care of it... We both felt a little guilty for "tattling" on our Chinese co-teacher.

So fast forward to Sunday (sorry Saturday wasn't very exciting. I just studied Chinese all day). I went to Baotu Springs with some people in my group. We had a lot of fun but it was a very hot and tiring day. We even met an English teacher who gave us "egg cookies" it was frosted cookies and I think they call it egg because you use egg to make the frosting. It was pretty good. The English teacher was very nice and made great conversation with us! 

Now here we are today... Monday morning when I'm supposed to have my class to give feedback on their essays.  I went to the classroom with the Chinese teacher, the deputy director of the international center, our foreign administrator, and Joanna... My students ran up and hugged me excited to hear all about my weekend. After a brief greeting I told them, "You better get into the classroom, you have American Literature now... I'm no longer your teacher." They immediately started gasping, tearing up (yes I caused tears), asking why, and eventually they started yelling in Chinese at their Chinese teacher. I understood some of the words they were saying (hey my Chinese is improving) such as why, don't understand, don't have, and a few swear words... The Chinese teacher talked with them for a few minutes while they latched onto my arms and legs like they were 5-year-olds. I was shocked how much they didn't want to join the Am. Lit. class. It's not like I'm leaving the school... I'm still going to be in the office next to their classroom. I'm still going to see them between classes. I'm still going to hang out with them on club days during their self-study time.  It's incredible how quickly I bonded with them. So about 10 minutes after calming them down and herding them into the classroom, I wished my roommate good luck in English and told my students to be good in Chinese. You would never guess that my students were 17 and 18 by the way they acted this morning. It was touching but also a little embarrassing. Mostly it was just heartbreaking. 

So here I am now, sitting in my office... blogging, learning Chinese, eating intensely weird foods, you know, the usual.  My schedule now looks like this: On a long week I have 3 classes on Tuesday and 4 classes on Wednesday.  On a short week I have 1 class Monday, 2 classes Wednesday, 1 on Thursday, and 2 on Friday. What do I do on those days I have no class you ask? I study Chinese... ALL DAY! Not the most efficient way to learn but honestly... what else am I going to do? I asked my administrator what I should be doing since I have no class transcripts to work on and his answer was, "Once we set up a system I will let you know." Uhhhh xiexie for not helping me at all. I'm frustrated but at the same time over it because it's been this way since day 1 of arriving here. I'm learning to go with flow... kinda. I'll let you know my progress as I time passes. Until then... Laters.