I am an inspiration

Most of you know that I am, among other things, a chameleon and a mirror. I try to blend in as much as possible while still being unique. I mirror everyone else's energy and personalities so that I get along with them as much as I can. Last night at our last FightClub meeting we had a compliment car wash for the seniors. Everyone said that they loved my energy, dedication, and commitment to the club and in everything I did. I found that to be touching but also kinda funny. I don't think of myself as a particularly energetic, dedicated, or committed person. I do what I'm told because it's what I was told. Sometimes I add my own flare with it (OK, most times) but for the most part, I'm just doing what I feels right. I matched the level of energy that I felt in the meetings and carried it out from day to day making sure I was never without the support of my conflict coaches, my mediators, my friends. I never in a million years would have called myself an inspiration but almost everyone wrote that on my shirt.

Parents in my old dance team used to tell me I was a role model for their daughters or I was someone they wanted their children to grow up to be. At the time they were telling me that, I would always think to myself, "yea if you knew me outside of the dance setting, you would NOT want your daughter to be like me." I'm exceptionally uptight, neurotic, and I worry about the little things too much. After attending a college 6,000 miles away from home and going through about 4 different personalities before settling on one I could live with for the rest of my life, I finally realize what people are talking about when they compliment me. I've managed to turn my views of who I am from negative to positive using the same personality traits. While I am still uptight, neurotic, and worrisome about the little things, that is what some people would call dedication. In my senior year, I learned how to have fun, how to live, how to love. I would not have been able to do that without my club supporting me.

Now back to that mirror image I gave you in the beginning of this blog. I mirror what other people are. You know that saying, "treat others as you would like to be treated"?? Yea, well, I live by a similar motto: Live the lives you see and like, then do it better (I'm a VERY competitive person). I see who others are and I mimic the ones I like. Then I take it to the next level and make it noticeable to you. We learn this in mediation, sometimes it takes another voice to tell you what you said before you realize what you said. If you all are calling me an inspiration, it's only because I am projecting what you are in a way you can see it. I am only as happy as the person I am with. You see me as happy-go-lucky?? You're probably the reason I'm like that.

So, with all that said, I would like to dedicate this blog to my beloved FightClub. Seniors, you already got my compliments last night so I'll leave with this last message, "Go shine, Go mediate, Go fight for what you believe in."
Everyone else, good luck with this amazing club. Keep me proud. I look forward to talking with you and hearing how everything is going. Keep me posted. Until then... Laters.